Page 1 Page 2 Page 3 Page 4 Page 5 Page 6 Page 7 Page 8 Page 9 Page 10 Page 11 Page 12 Page 13 Page 14 Page 15 Page 16 Page 17 Page 18 Page 19 Page 20 Page 21 Page 22 Page 23 Page 24 Page 25 Page 26 Page 27 Page 28 Page 29 Page 30 Page 31 Page 32 Page 33 Page 34 Page 35 Page 36 Page 37 Page 38 Page 39 Page 40 Page 41 Page 42 Page 43 Page 44 Page 45 Page 46 Page 47 Page 48 Page 49 Page 50 Page 51 Page 52 Page 53 Page 54 Page 55 Page 56 Page 57 Page 58 Page 59 Page 60 Page 61 Page 62 Page 63 Page 64I recently had a conflict with a colleague—it was unpleasant and our words resulted in per- sonal attacks. I began to ponder how we got to such a negative place in our relationship. I realized we are very different. And neither of us has taken the time to get to know each other well enough to understand those differences. Most conflict happens because of differences in opinion, belief, person- ality type, life experience, style of relating, even how one was raised. Those differences help build amazing teams, but it’s easy to misinterpret those differences in others. We all know that conflict is a part of life and, even more so, in a busy and stressful kitchen environment. So it’s crucial to know how to handle conflict in a healthy manner. Max Lucado has said, “Conflict is inevitable, but combat is optional.” I learned some things through this recent conflict that I want to share with you. Have regular social interaction. This can easily happen through time set aside just to “talk” or by eating lunch or dinner together on shift. When I worked at Victory Trade School, our staff always ate lunch together before our weekly meeting. It was plain old social time and essentially—in my opinion—incog- nito team building. Friendliness and sharing life together will build a team quicker than anything else I know. Be open-minded and recognize that we are all different. Humbly accept each person as they are. It is not for us to change others, but to change ourselves. We have the power to react and relate differently and love unconditionally. Don’t trust your emotions. Emotion skews reality. So when in a heated conflict, walk away and come back when you’re calmer. Then arrange a time to talk when you know maturity will take over. Seek forgiveness. Conflicts hurt deeply, so it is important to find reconciliation. Holding a grudge will only bring more pain and cement bitterness in your heart. And it will quickly erode any previous kinship you had with that person. Make an agreement with yourself that you will always seek peace. Move forward. Conflict is a natu- ral progression to a more intimate relationship. If we recognize that conflict is actually important for a more meaningful relationship, then we don’t have to fear it. Working through conflict is not easy, but we can trust the process to be good for us—by helping us grow in how we love others, by deepening those relationships, and by recogniz- ing and understanding differences in others, which will build healthier and stronger teams. Ĩ 56 WWW.AGRM.ORG JULY/AUGUST 2016 FULL PLATE Brian Romano Food Fights Handle conflict in healthy ways for a stronger kitchen crew Brian is a certified executive chef who holds degrees in culinary arts and restaurant and hospitality management. He serves as culinary instructor for Flint Hill Technical College in Emporia, Kansas. You can contact him at chefromano13@gmail.com. DAY-TO-DAY